The Family Guy Theme Song Lyrics are instantly recognizable to millions of fans around the world. This catchy tune, played at the beginning of each episode of the animated sitcom Family Guy, sets the stage for the show’s irreverent and often controversial humor. But beyond its catchy melody, the song itself is a clever piece of comedic writing that deserves a closer look.
The lyrics, performed by the main cast members in character, offer a satirical commentary on the perceived decline of values and entertainment quality in modern society compared to a romanticized “good old days”. Let’s break down the lyrics verse by verse to understand the jokes and cultural references embedded within.
[Lois]
It seems today that all you see
Is violence in movies and sex on TV
[Peter]
But where are those good 'ol fashioned values
On which we used to rely?
[Brian]
It used to be a big time star
Was elegant as Garbo, or Hedy Lamarr
[Stewie]
But now we get whores like Jenny Lopez
You want to curl up and die
Lucky there's a Family Guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
[Stewie] Laugh and cry
He's our Family Guy
The song opens with Lois lamenting the state of contemporary media, complaining about the prevalence of violence and sex. Peter chimes in, yearning for “good ‘ol fashioned values”. This sets up a nostalgic, almost mock-conservative tone that is immediately undercut by the following lines.
Brian then reminisces about classic Hollywood elegance, mentioning iconic actresses Greta Garbo and Hedy Lamarr. Stewie’s sharp retort provides the punchline, contrasting these figures with a far more contemporary and provocative pop culture figure, Jennifer Lopez. The use of the word “whores” is intentionally jarring and typical of Family Guy’s shock humor, highlighting the perceived degradation of celebrity culture in a deliberately over-the-top manner. Stewie’s concluding line, “You want to curl up and die,” amplifies the comedic exaggeration.
The chorus then kicks in, introducing the “Family Guy” as a source of relief amidst this cultural decay. The phrase “Lucky there’s a Family Guy” becomes a recurring motif, celebrating the show (and Peter Griffin, the titular family guy) as a chaotic yet comforting presence. Stewie’s interjection, “Laugh and cry,” adds another layer of comedic cynicism, perhaps hinting at the emotional rollercoaster that Family Guy often delivers.
[Louis]
When I was young, the songs were fair
With Mister Johnny Mathis, and Sonny and Cher
[Peter]
But now we get Justin Timber-homo
[Louis]
A heartache all gone awry!
[Brian]
The classic films were works of art
The images were graceful, the stories were smart
[Stewie]
But now we get Matrix Revolution, I'm sorry I know this doesn't rhyme
But what the hell were you Wachowski Brothers thinking?!
Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a fella, sweeter than vanilla
Wholesome as a piece of
[Stewie] Apple pie
He's a family guy
In the second verse, Lois continues the nostalgic theme, recalling the seemingly innocent music of Johnny Mathis and Sonny and Cher. Peter’s response is again deliberately crass and anachronistic, referencing Justin Timberlake with a homophobic slur. This line is highly controversial and exemplifies Family Guy’s tendency to push boundaries, often relying on shock value for comedic effect. Louis’s reaction, “A heartache all gone awry!”, expresses bewildered disappointment.
Brian praises the artistic merit of classic films, emphasizing their “graceful images” and “smart stories.” Stewie, however, brings things crashing back to earth with a reference to The Matrix Revolutions, widely considered the weakest film in the Matrix trilogy. Stewie’s self-aware comment, “I’m sorry I know this doesn’t rhyme,” and his exasperated question to the Wachowski Brothers, add a meta-comedic layer, acknowledging the absurdity and subjective nature of these cultural comparisons.
The chorus returns, this time describing the “Family Guy” as “sweeter than vanilla” and “wholesome as a piece of apple pie.” These deliberately cliché and saccharine descriptions are ironic, given the show’s often crude and offensive humor. Stewie’s deadpan delivery of “Apple pie” further underscores the comedic contrast.
[Lois]
His smile's a simple delight
[Chris]
He lets me see the boobies on the internet sites
[Lois]
Peter!
[Meg]
He bought me my cute little hat
[Brian]
Yeah, we should have a talk about that
About that! And his hat!
[Brian]
He's mastered the comedy arts
[Stewie]
He says, Look out, Hiroshima! Then casually farts
[Lois]
He's loaded with sexy appeal
[Peter]
And best of all my titties are real, Have a feel!
[Brian]
No thank you
[Stewie]
I gave it the office
This verse shifts to more specific (and increasingly inappropriate) examples of Peter’s behavior. Lois praises his “simple delight” smile, but Chris immediately undercuts this with a typically teenage and internet-obsessed comment about Peter letting him see “boobies on the internet sites.” Lois’s exasperated “Peter!” is a classic sitcom reaction.
Meg’s line about a “cute little hat” seems almost mundane and out of place, highlighting her often-ignored and pathetic character. Brian’s response, “Yeah, we should have a talk about that,” hints at potentially inappropriate or questionable circumstances surrounding the hat, adding a layer of dark humor. The repetition of “About that! And his hat!” emphasizes the awkwardness and unresolved nature of the situation.
The lyrics then attempt to praise Peter’s comedic abilities, but Stewie immediately derails this with a shocking and offensive joke about Hiroshima followed by a crude fart joke. This exemplifies Family Guy’s reliance on sudden shifts in tone and deliberately tasteless humor. Lois tries to highlight Peter’s “sexy appeal,” but Peter’s vulgar response about his “titties” being real and his invitation to “Have a feel!” are deliberately repulsive and anti-sexy. Brian’s disgusted “No thank you” and Stewie’s dry “I gave it the office” further emphasize the awkward and inappropriate nature of Peter’s antics.
[Lois]
The Brady Bunch has got their Mike
And pretty Laura Petrie has Dicky Van Dyke
But who around here could fill those loafers?
But here's a happy reply
Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do all the thing that
Make us
[Stewie] Laugh and cry!
He's a Family Guy!
He's a Family Guy
The final verse references classic sitcom families, The Brady Bunch and The Dick Van Dyke Show, specifically mentioning the idealized father figures, Mike Brady and Dick Van Dyke’s character. Lois questions who could fill their “loafers” in the present day, seemingly lamenting the lack of wholesome family role models. The “happy reply” is, of course, the “Family Guy.”
The final chorus and outro reiterate the central theme: despite the perceived decline of values and good taste, “lucky there’s a Family Guy.” The repetition of “He’s a Family Guy!” reinforces the show’s self-aware and celebratory tone.
In conclusion, the Family Guy theme song lyrics are a microcosm of the show’s humor: irreverent, satirical, often offensive, and always pushing boundaries. By contrasting a romanticized past with a deliberately exaggerated and crass present, the song sets the stage for the comedic chaos and cultural commentary that Family Guy delivers each week. For fans searching for family guy theme song lyrics, understanding the nuances and jokes within the song provides an even deeper appreciation for the show’s unique brand of humor.